The year I found myself

Assalamualaikum, hi guys :) mai nak tanya, korang pernah tak dengar this quote -

'A year changes you a lot'

Pernah tak rasa macam quote ni jadi dalam hidup korang? Mesti pernah kan. So do I :') Jadi, harini mai nak share how amazing my 2019 was ! That year was my third year in the college. My college days were superb that makes me wanna share some activites that I did with my friends :) Read till the end if you wanna know what I've learnt okie?

1) 5KM Fun Run

For the first time in my life, I joined a run voluntarily. Pernah pun time merentas desa kat sekolah dulu. Tu pun mai jalan je tak berlari pun sbb rasa terpaksa xD I hate running, seriously. But I challenged myself that time to join my batchmates participate in Mizuno Wave Run. Mai join 5km Fun Run je, tak mampu lagi nak 10km terus kang takut pengsan tengah jalan lmao. Walaupun 5km tu kacang je kan for some people, but it was a new accomplishment for me tauu. Bukan senang k mai nak berlari xD Setakat ni tu jela run yang mai pernah join after that tak join memana dah hihi

2) FunFair

This happened a day before result final exam keluar (nervous k ngl). My friends and I plan nak pergi food hunting dekat AbsolutFest, lepastu sampai2 ada FunFair jugak kat situu. OMG EXCITED GILA. Petang tu kitorang foodhunting then malam baru pergi main FunFair. Terlupa kejap rasa nervous time tu lol. Naik merry-go-round pun rasa heaven sangat. Excited mcm budak2 haha. Banyak benda yg kitorang main, tapi paling mai takboleh lupa bila naik benda yg pusing 360 degree tu, tak ingat nama dia apa. Bukan Ferris Wheel k, tp dia boleh naik 4 orang je and spin laju bagai tiada hari esok. Memang syok gilaa, mai memang suka pergi theme park naik benda gayat2 ni. Adrenaline rush giteww. After that kitorang balik lambat sebab lepak mamak lagi lepastu waduhh. Enjoy tak ingat dunia ek. Nasib baik esoknya result keluar, semua pass xD alhamdulillah.

3) Facilitator for SPM students

Okay time ni mai jadi faci untuk adik2 SPM, they came from various top boarding schools (it was an honour k). There was a lot of games and activities with them. It was fun to talk and interact with the students and other facilitators. This event is called SaltB!. Sunwayians tahu la ni event apa kan. The process of making it happen ain't easy. I joined the game testing few times before the real event. I made so many new friends time ni, syok la dah stress study so kita main2 pulak dengan ramai orang. Memang gelak jela manjang. Even though sehari je event (plus penat gila hahah ngl), but it totally worth it !

4) Global Audit Simulation

This program was conducted by Sunway College and since it's 'Global', many universities from all over the world participated in this event too. Ada from Dubai, Bahrain, Indonesia, India and so many more. It was great to see new faces. Mai dapat team yang mai tak pernah nampak langsung. I am the only Malay student, yang lain Chinese and one from Indonesia, which is our team leader (yg baju biru belang tu). Since no one is Malay, so I had to talk in English for the whole week, from morning till night, just imagine that xD Fortunately, we made a great team with good chemistry. We made jokes when things get bored and we cared a lot about each other. I remember when I felt nauseous and my teammates asked if I need anything. The next day, my team leader, Fanny, brought a herbal medicine in case I need it again. So loving, right? Walaupun seminggu je kenal, but I still keep in touch with some of them :)

5) Gamelan

This is my hobby since I was a kid! Playing musical instruments <3 time ni kitorang dapat perform untuk Raya Celebration dekat Sunway uni. We practiced Gamelan since awal tahun semata2 for this tau !! Determine sangat kan :’) twas lots of fun tho. My team practice dekat bawah tanah Dataran Merdeka for almost every week. Time tu baru mai tahu rupanya ada mall dekat bawah tu xD

6) Sunway Lagoon

Facts : Mai main dekat Sunway Lagoon for 5 times in 2019

This was one of the best things bila study dekat Sunway, jalan kaki je dah sampai Sunway Lagoon and Sunway Pyramid. Tahun 2019 Sunway College tetiba baik hati nak bagi ticket free Sunway Lagoon untuk semua students. Tiket tu pulak for 6 months hihi apa lagi kan, hari takda kelas je terus pergi Sunway Lagoon dengan kawan2. Even though dah main banyak kali, mai still nak pergi lagi T_T Mai paling suka naik Vuvuzela and Tomahawk sebab rasa nak tercabut jantung lol. Tapi tula nak beratur tu bapak panjang lelagi kalau weekend. So jangan pergi weekend k kalau tanak bazir duit.

7) Staycation with my G

Post-final staycation with Mayang and Qilah at The Everly Putrajaya. Time ni Mai kena review hotel ni so alang2 ajak la my friends. Walaupun pergi 3 orang je, dah cukup riuh untuk satu bilik k xD Walaupun satu malam je tidur hotel but we did a lot of silly things together. Bila ingat balik, time staycation ni kitorang banyak buat benda pointless je hahaha. Well, nama pun post-final kan so we're just chillin'. It's pointless and silly but that what makes this short trip memorable hihi. Btw, I spent most of my time during 2019 with these two ! Couldn't ask for more <3

8) Netball

Ada 2 jenis sukan yang mai suka, Zumba and netball. I'm not a great netball player, but I can play and I love it ! Time ni ada netball competition among Sunway students. So, my friends and I decided to take a part in this competition. We participated this just for fun actually. Funnily enough, kitorang main tak target utk menang langsung HAHA. Practice pun 2 3 kali je. Team lain semua fuhh serious gila main, daebak. Kitorang daebak jugak, time main banyak jerit gila2, tapi goal tak setanding jeritan xD Of course la kalah kan, but WE HAD SO MUCH FUN !!!

So, tulah antara benda2 yang mai buat tahun 2019. Panjang kan? ni pun mai tak share semua tau xD Mai memang aktif gila tahun 2019, padahal tahun2 before tu tak rajin and tak semangat pun nak join banyak2 benda kat college. But I challenged myself that year to stay out of my comfort zone, other than studying for finals. I'm glad I did. Memang rasa tahun tu tahun paling productive sepanjang study dekat college. Nasib baik sempat buat semua tu, tup tup 2020 Covid-19 huhu.

Fyi, my mental health was not in a good condition the years before. I felt like I was losing myself slowly. It had been a difficult time for me till I lost 5kg within a week or two. Nope, bukan sebab ambik ubat kurus ya haha. Tapi selera makan mai merudum teruk (for some reasons that I don’t want to disclose). Sampai orang sekeliling yg kena check mai makan ke tak.

However, I didn't let myself be in that state for too long. I sought help, I talked to my friends, I spent more time with my loved ones, I tried new things and I joined all those activities without anyone asked me to do so. I'm so grateful that I was surrounded with supportive people. I'm grateful that I was brave enough to take baby steps to gain back my peace and happiness. I think if I didn't start helping myself back then, I might not be here today. I swear it was hard at first, but it's getting better eventually. Better than ever. And the most loving compliment that I'll never forget was "Mai, you look happier. I love seeing you like this. Keep going". That was the time I know, I did it. I found myself :)

Side note : Thank you to the people who crossed my life. Not everyone is meant to stay in your life because people come and go, and I understand that. I really appreciate those who checked on me, cheered me up or just simply said "Hi" to me on the street. Having you guys to be part of my chapter was such a blessing. I learned a lot that year and I will keep that in my heart. And hey, I miss my friends and if you are reading this, I hope you are doing well. Take care.

Xoxo, Mai